Game Time - Part 4: Who Will Ask

To wrap up this discussion on the game time question you'll get we should talk about who will approach you?  This is good to know, so you won't be surprised.  Some of these cases are easy to deal with, others will throw you for a loop.  Here they are:

1. First time parent - this will be someone new to the program who may not understand the program history.  My kids sat the bench most of the time for their first two years they played, so I know the feeling.  Other parents just paid $100 for their kid to play and wonder why they didn't play the first game.  The approach is to educate if their not hostile.  Hostile? Give short explanation and give them feedback on their hostility. Don't let them do that to you.

2. Mr. Hostile - you'll get the guy who just always seems angry.  Had one guy who always seemed to keep his distance from other people.  Then one day he lands the game time question.  Direct and hostile.  Not necessarily a yeller.  Approach: firm, short answers, no arguing.

3. Crying Mother - ugh.  These are the hardest.  Hold on to your seat and get a box of tissues.  This can be over the phone or in person.  Pray it's over the phone.  Approach: uh, no idea, but review the checklist and be confident of your decision.

4. Unknown Fan - This one cracks me up.  This is the guy who you don't know, from some other team, who will heap (false) praise on you then give you a hard time.  Of all of them, this one is probably the easiest to deal with.  Approach: thanks for input, walk away.  No debate, no discussion.

5. The Friend - You'll probably get close to some of the parents on the team.  Then one day they'll ask the game time question.  This may come as a reasonable sincere question, or it may come as a very disappointed, 'you betrayed me'  question.  Approach: this one hurts.  Love.

6. Mr. Serious Professional - This is the guy who is professional, serious, and concerned about his kid.  Similar to the first timer, but he'll grill you more effectively than the others.  'How will my son get better if you don't play him?'  Approach: professional, educate.  This is not an argument to be won.

7. The Player - My son was the perfect example.  He would slide up closer and closer to the coach during the game and gradually whisper - 'I am ready coach'.  Kids aren't as sophisticated as adults, so their ask will be more immature - good opportunity to help them grow.  Approach: Opportunity to help them grow.

You can get any combination of these.  I'm sure next year will bring a new type that will throw me for a loop - chalk it up to experience.  To summarize how to respond:

• Set expectations.  At start of season, be clear on your game time policy. 
• Listen.  Use the check list.  You may have missed something.
• Sympathize.  You've been there with your own kids.
• Be firm.  You're the coach, you make the decision.
• Thanks for input.  You'll think about it.  Really, you should.
• End conversation.  If this drags on, end it.
• Other Issues?  Maybe this isn't just about game time.

Bottom line: God is Teaching.  Maybe God is teaching you something.  Maybe using you to teach them.